The process continues

Jay was walking around in the room. Pearly was downstairs having a chat with the Danish lady who was still staying...

Jay walked around the bed and back and forth between the sparse furniture in the room.

He could not lie down on the bed because he had so much pain in his body. His arms were aching the most. It felt like 1000 needles were puncturing the skin from inside...

He rubbed his arms until they got red and very soar. He grew tired of walking and finally laid down on the bed for a bit of comfort.

He closed his eyes and tried to breath slowly, but the pain still kept on working underneath his skin... He rose up again and went into the bathroom to chill his arms with cold running water, but to no avail; his arms were aching more than ever now.

He went into the room and sat down in the armchair by the window. He looked down at his arms and noticed that they were starting to rip open. He could clearly see the red muscles and tendons being displayed. He flung himself down on the bed and screamed; without a sound.

Both his arms were ripped open now; it sounded like someone was tearing a newspaper into pieces.

He just lay there, not able to move any more. His chest started to ache and he could feel the same sensation as he had had in his arms.

Now the skin on his chest was starting to open and again he could see the red meat underneath it exposed. He saw the heart beating, but not the heart itself. Somehow this was consolidating to him. The heart was working and he was alive. The fact that his heart was beating was very comforting for him. He felt consolidated by it...

Still his body was being torn apart as he saw it; his back his legs, his buttocks. His whole body was a devastating sight. As he watched this tearing and ripping and at the same time listening to it he observed that the process started to deepen; the red meat and the tendons faded away and his bone structure became more imminent.

"My God! My body is disappearing!" he thought...

"L.J. What is going on. Please tell me and help me out of this situation. I am very afraid now!"

There was no answer from the little angel.

Again, Jay had to focus on the whole procedure that was going on. He obviously had to go through all this cleansing to be "clean" enough to enter a state of enlightenment.

Taking this view of his process, he could clearly see that the present situation was targeting his fear; his total fear as he had carried it with him all his life