Saturday, March 13, 2010

the life coach 11







11


Chet appears again...


Jay is having a cup of coffee by the “Nea Hora” beach in the Cappucio Cafe where they have the best Cappuccino. He is waiting for his friend Jeff to arrive.

It is still an hour before lunch and he has brought a book to read while waiting and enjoying it along with his coffee.


He starts reading, but is distracted by the view around him. He is sitting underneath the palm trees by the sidewalk. People are passing by all the time; some wet, some sunburned; splashing water and sand around them. Some are pretty, some are fat, some are young and some are old.


On these beaches in this area of the world it doesn't count how you look. Everybody is there just to; either get the desired tan before they go home after their 2 weeks of vacation, or someone is there to cool off in the water and meet friends, just hanging around. Some fall in love with the beautiful young Greek men and boys and some are being ripped off by smart salesmen and regular crooks.


Gypsy women screaming out their offers; today they are selling beautiful tablecloths in damask. These women have a bad temper and never hesitate to bully their potential customers if they are not willing to buy their products!

Some are there to have a massage by a troop of Chinese massagists and massageuses who visits the beaches of Crete every summer season.


The whole scenery creates a picture of plurality; there's almost nothing going on by the beach that is strange to any humans. Anything can happen...


Jay sits on and tries to read, and he manages for a while until he is disturbed by someone he doesn't want to meet.


A tap on his shoulder and as he turns he is confronted with Chet's purple face; obviously he's had a couple of beers. "Hi, Doc; enjoying the view and the sun?" Chet is ever so casual and smiling.

"Hi, I have to tell you that I'd rather sit here alone than having you around me right now, Chet; I hope you can understand that?"

He notices that Chet's face is darkening and expects the worst. "I was just coming here to apologize for my bad behavior the last time we met, but it seems you don't want to hear what I have to say about it. You know I have the right to express myself on this matter too."

"Chet, sit down, please. If you want to apologize, then do it, but you have to mean it; if not I'd rather not see you around me anymore."


Then Chet explodes again. He has taken his position just half a meter from Jay and suddenly he kicks Jay's chair over so he tumbles down in the gutter. Then he comes down at him and start punching his face and his whole body. Jay is prepared this time and quickly manages to kick him in the groin and Chet falls over and into the street while screaming: "You Maniac, you Academic asshole maniac!!"


People have gathered around them and a couple of big Greek men are holding Chet back. They have witnessed what has happened from the beginning and now they are lifting him up by his armpits and drag him along the sidewalk and then all the way down the beach and when they reach the sea, they keep on walking into the waves until they are far out and then they just shuffle him away into the sea.


Jay has got on his feet again and is taken care of inside the cafe. He hasn't been too damaged by Chet's hits, but he is feeling very devastated by the whole incident.


Still he is worried about Chet; "can he swim? Have they done any harm to him?"

He is mostly thinking of the aftermath of the incident and what eventually will happen to himself.


He goes down to the sea and there, far out, he can see Chet wading in the direction of his flat at Christopoli while angling his walk to avoid anyone who has witnessed what happened. Soon he reaches the beach at the far end of it and creeps up on the sand and walks along the beach until he disappears around the next corner...


Jay goes inside again and orders a Brandy for his comfort.

He sits by the window to watch when Jeff arrives outside.

Jeff has been a close friend for a couple of years now and they often go out together to share a meal or a special event. Jeff is a small, but good looking man and he is annoyed by his size. He is longing for a woman to share his life with. He comes from the Middle East area, but left for the west when he was a young man. He doesn't want to go back to his homeland too often and has taken on a western way of living. He is a good cook and often invites Jay over for a delicious meal. Always pleasant company for Jay, but underneath his smooth masks he carries anger. He is working on it, but sometimes he admits that the mentality of the Middle East is coming up in him...


20 minutes later he arrives outside and the waitress goes out to tell him that Jay is waiting for him inside.

Jeff enters and looks at Jay. He can see the bruises in his face and his swollen right eye.

"Jay! What has happened to you?!"


"Come and sit down with me, Jeff, my good friend, come and sit down with me and I will tell you."

Fadi walks up to the bar and orders a cappuccino.


Coming back to the table he looks at Jay. "Please tell me!"


Jay tells and then he tells again to give Fadi a fair chance to understand the reasons why he has been attacked.


"Are you sure you will keep on with this job, my friend?"

"It's what I know, Jeff. Humans have always attracted me. They are a great species, but also great in the terms of carrying deep sorrows, deep fear and the ability to act on that in the way these emotions are demanding them to. That's when we commit so called "sins", which are just very devastating forces that tear us apart sometimes.


This is what the old Greeks called the “Thanatos and Eros complex”, where Thanatos is the bad and destructive force in our lives and Eros the opposite. They are not good or bad, but a picture of the balance in all living beings.”


"Wow! I didn't mean to go that far, but what you say is interesting"

"Yes, Jeff, it is, but sometimes we are hit by these forces, you know; that's what happened today"...


"What are you going to do about it? Report it to the police?"

"I was just thinking of that, before you came. "Listen: I have done this before. Following the recommendations that Don Juan gave Carlos Castaneda about how to deal with petty tyrants. You have read the books, haven't you?"

"I have, but I don't go as deep as you, you know. Tell me more; what will you have to do to get rid of this one?"

"That's where I need your help, Jeff. Can we go home to my place; Pearly will be coming in soon; she was just going to the market to buy the vegetables for a salad and we can talk about this together. Maybe I can persuade Earl to come too."


"Ah, Pearly!” I hear some rumors about you two! You know you cannot hide anything in our small society here in Chania."

"I know and I am happy that the good news is spreading!" "Shall we go.?"

"Yes, ok, let me finish my coffee first."


Jay waits for his friend, looking out the window...

Jeff finishes his coffee and they leave...

It takes them 15 minutes to reach the house. When they arrive, they can hear Pearly inside. She is singing again... "I tell you, my friend, this woman is probably the most precious treasure I have held in my arms my entire life and I am not going to leave her, ever!"


Jeff laughs a happy kind of laughter. "I am sure, Jay and I am very happy for you - and for her!"

"Thank you, my friend!"


They enter the house and the singing stops. "Hello, my darling! You can keep on singing if you want, I like your voice, you know"... "Is that the only thing you like about me?"


"Give me a week and I will be able to map up everything that I like about you, my love." "Ok, but then"... She enters the hall and sees Jeff there. "Oh, we have a guest, I can see. Hello Jeff!" Then she turns to Jay and notices the bruises and the swelling around his eye. "Jay! What has happened to you?!" "I'll tell you afterwards when we have lunch, ok?"


"Ok, but..." "It's not as bad as it looks Pearly and I promise I will tell you while we're eating."


They go inside and into the kitchen where Pearly has made a delicious salad. "Good men; let's take this out on the balcony and in the shadow, ok?" she says. None of the two good men are unwilling to help...

"All arranged on the balcony, Pearly!" Jay says...

"OK, I am coming right now; can you bring the bread and the wine, please?" "Yes of course, my love!"


Jay goes into the kitchen and opens a bottle of white wine and picks up the bread basket.

As soon as they start eating, Pearly wants to hear what's happened this morning. Jay tells his story and both Pearly and Fadi are astonished by the violence Chet pours out on Jay.


"You have to remember that I am the one who is revealing his bad sides and sometimes I have to provoke him to make a breach in his thick walls. So I will be the one he can use his aggression on. He is angry with women, but has to please them, because they give him something soft and caressing.

Still, there has to be a border somewhere, when he has to be denied access; the point of no return, if you want..."


"When will that moment arrive then, my love?",says Pearly. "We are going to start on that process now. After the last attack I know that this relationship cannot go on; both for him and for me."


"How can we start then?" Jeff asks.


"OK, here goes: a question for you two first; have you ever read Carlos Castaneda and specifically about Petty Tyrants?"

Jeff says: "Yes, but I cannot remember it all, I am sorry; it's a long time ago."

Pearly: "Yes I have and I remember that we were a small group that roamed forests, mountains and spooky places to find the source of power. I also remember some situations where Petty Tyrants were involved; they were a nasty creed, these people!"

"OK, fine. These days we would call them bullies, but still the petty tyrants Castaneda described were real monsters, that’s for sure!


The clue here is that Don Juan described in one particular book how to get rid of them. If you are coming under the power of a Petty Tyrant or a bully if you like, you must do something out of the ordinary, something exceptional that the bully cannot foresee; especially not from you; his victim.


In other words: I am going to create a situation for Chet that he would not expect from me. It involves a couple of friends of mine; Albanians, but not of the hardest mafia kind. They are ordinary guys working in a restaurant in town. I will not relieve their names; they will need all the immunity they can have."

Jeff looks up at Jay: "What would you make them do to get rid of this fellow?"

"I will ask them to go to Chet's apartment in Christopoli and ruffle him up a bit and tell him that they will keep an eye on him all the time as long as he stays here. Your comments will be appreciated."


Pearly says: "I can’t just believe that Chet will accept this. Surely he will see you as the culprit here, don't you think? His next step would be to attack you again and maybe me or some of your friends..."

"Yes, I have thought of that possibility too, but I think that option may be avoided."

"How?" says Jeff. "I will have to see how our plan works out and then I'll tell you. If it doesn't I have to find another solution."

"One thing I know, Jay; I cannot see you beaten up one more time, then I will call the police, whether you want to or not."


Jeff says: "Jay, you told me today that you had done this before. Would you mind telling us how you did it? I am very curious as to how it can be applied to a bully!"


Jay looked at him for a while, contemplating... "OK, I'll tell you, briefly what happened: I was working in Split, Croatia for some time during the war on the Balkans. Me and another guy were running the radio room as radio operators. There was a Pakistani accountant in charge of the economy department. He was a very tidy and punctilious man and a nuisance in his ways. As long as everything went well, there were no problems.


What happened was this: he came into the radio room one day and accused us for using the fax line for phoning home. We denied this, but then he showed us a printout from the PTT office in town that showed our telephone numbers at home. I still protested; saying that my daughters had been with me for 2 months this summer and I couldn't have called them. He was not satisfied with this of course and left the office.


One day he came by the radio room and said that he had to stop my payments for this month until our case was settled. I looked at him and jumped out of my chair. He retreated into the corridor, but somehow I got hold of his shirt collar. I lifted him up against the wall and held him there, saying: "You are not allowed to do that! I have a house and a household to pay for at home where my daughters are staying with their grandmother and I have my own expenses here!!" Then I let go of him and he ran straight into the manager's office. I was later called in and said that I would pay 1000 DM and no more!


We had taken these phone calls, but it was annoying and humiliating for us and that triggered an anger in me that was unique. I have never suffered so much from it before.

I couldn't sleep at night and I couldn't eat. I was angry and aggravated all the time. I lost weight and I was in all ways uncomfortable.


One night when staying at home I remembered the chapters in Castaneda's book and decided that I had to do something about this situation I had brought myself in. During the night I found a plan for it...

The next morning at the office, I went very early to Marw's office and knocked. I went in before he could say: "enter". I came in and said good morning in a most polite manner, while smiling.


I tell you; I really felt good and relieved! After my greetings I just sat down in one of the visitor's chairs in front of his desk, without waiting for his permission. Marw was just sitting there, looking very afraid... I said: "Marw, I want to thank you for showing me the right way in this matter", then I put 1000 DM on his table.


Then, to his astonishment I went around his desk and aimed my steps straight towards him, smiling all the way. I stopped one step in front of him; he backed his swivel chair up against the wall. Then I took the last step up to his chair and threw my arms around his neck and kissed him on both cheeks while all the time saying: "thank you, thank you!" Then I just went out of the office...


There was never a word about this case again as long as I stayed there..."

"Wow!", Fadi said, "I can understand; you should never be that intimate with a Pakistani superior, you know!"


Pearly just looked at Jay and then she said: "can you create something similar again, you think?"

"I hope so, my love!"


They went into the living room and sat down for a chat until Jeff said he had to go; he had some business to attend to. "What kind of business is that, Jeff?" Jay asked. "I am going to Spain next week and have to prepare for it. "Jeff, what is going on here? Do you think that I can guess?" Jay said. "Yes, you can", Jeff said.


"OK, Jeff", Pearly said, "thank you for coming, it's been a pleasure." "Oh no", Jeff said”, the pleasure is completely on my side."


So, there were farewells in the hall and Fadi went off. He didn't live too far away from Jay and Pearly.


crnning@gmail.com


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Preferred reading

  • The Shadow of the Wind, C.R. Zafon
  • The Angel's Game. C.R Zafon
  • Romvokteren, Peter Nilson
  • The Tibetan Book of life and death
  • The denial of death, Ernest Becker
  • The Atman Project, Ken Wilber
  • Up from Eden, Ken wilber
  • Koloss, Finn Alnæs

The writer

The writer
Having a stroll in the old town of Chania

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Grown up man searching for something that has been found... never to be lost again Working with clients through painting, drawing and conversations. See: www.illioscoaching.com